theres a song thats inside of my soul
its the one that i'v tried to write over and over again
i'm awake in the infanite cold.
but you sing to me over and over and over again
so i lay my head back down.
and i lift my hands and pray
to be only your i pray to be only yours
i know now. your my only hope

sing to me the song of the stars.
of your gallaxy dancing and laughing and laughing again
when it feels like my dreams are so far
sing to of the plans that you have for me over again
so i lay my head back down.
and i lift my hands and pray
to be only yours i pray to be only yours
i know now. your my only hope


i have ran across all the roads
i have been cut over and over
i have felt the cruel wind cut my face as i jumped
i have had my bones all crushed but rejoint again
i have been sawed up into little pieces and fixed back
i have realized my life is like a 1000 piece jig-saw puzzle
only to be fixed by someone who gives up on so easily


i cant seem to die

sunday.i woke up really really late on sunday. like 11.40am or sumthing. so we din really do anything that day. just watched tv and stuff.
monday. we ahd english test during assembly. it was quite difficult la. not sure if i can pass but i'm crossin my fingers.hahx. then after school, wenyi,maylin and me went to heartland. irene had to go home. saw nicole at the mrt station. we proceeded to kfc to eat. made a hell lot of noise there! haha! but it was fun la. then maylin had to go back to school for training. so wenyi and i, being the kind hearted souls. walked her to the busstop. then went back to heartland and just hanged out.
tuesday. school was abit stressing cox i was so sleepy! had rollerblading. my bunion hurt sooo much!
today. had teachers day celebrations along with axes day. during the essons we just slacked alot la. took some pics with lao shi's cam. then after school. went out with mel. first went to hougang mall to eat. then took the bus all the way to bukit timah. then back again..haha.

my life's getting more and more pathetic. i just follow my daily routine doing the same thing over and over again. sometimes i wonder why i have to end up like this. there are so many emotions floating in my mind. but how to pen them down: i don't know. i look forward to tomorrow with both fear and hope. will things improve. or will my life go on like that forever..



thursday. school was ok. i had alot of laughing gas in me though. laughed soo much. had rollerblading for track and field. i kinda blacked out for a while . suddenly the whole place looked very orange then i started seeing black dots everywhere. the coach said maybe my body tempreture was going up instead of down to cool me down. said i was not pespiring unlike everyone else. so i sat down and rested. mel and me walked out a usual but this time with the hope of seeing that montfort guy. as my guts told me. we din see him. friday. met mel after school to go french school. stupid.the french school was like closed or something . i only managed to see like one cute guy. poor mel saw none. but i don't think he's like the crush-able type. feel me? dumbness la.. we waited for like 2 and a half hours . then we went to the mcdonald opp. montfort. then walked to the montfort busstop. no cuties. bummer. so there goes my plt. not 1. had family dinner at nite. went to the zi cha place in ang mo kio. uncle richard was sitting beside me so i was very entertained. he told me to come to him whenever a boy treats me bad. "sarah. if any boy tries to harm my little princess i'll squash him like this." he took his can and crushed it. aww my hero haha. then there was this guy quite old who just came upt o uncle richard and shook his hand. started talking to him like he was a superstar. duno why but this happens to uncle richard alot. i mean how many ang-mo's get shaked by the hand everywhere he goes. kinda creepy huh. maybe he has some magnectic force to pull people to him or something. wierd. then as we were about to leave, that guy came over and hugged uncle richard. omg! i was so freaked out by it man! scary! my jaw just dropped. my mom had to like nudge me so it wasn't so obvious. oh well then today we had training. played floorball and street soccer. got hit by the soccer ball twice. shit

yototheyototheyaytotheHEY!
this is so melanie's thinggy.
ok well . on monday.everything was ok. nothing much happened. came home for dinner cox we were too lazt to go out. on tuesday, i could have sweared there was laughing gas in me. i laughed sooo much. in class and during track and field. o ya which leads me to rollerblading. din get ta see darren. ;( this guy called ray was coaching us. we learnt like another new skill.the strike 1. i'm quite proud of myself la. i couls break properly. so unlike mel. keeps turning everywhere haha! but i keep rolling away and poor shauna has to pull me back haha! anywas. after track shauna jia hui rui xuan and i think melvina went left us. so we went to the bubble tea shop as usual got drinks and walked out (me and mel). then when i got up the bus. mel suddenly called me to say she saw a cute guy. stoopid. but ya la haha.. then when i got to my lift lobby, i saw this 15/16/17 year old guy. whom i'v never saw before sitting down along the seats. he was so CUTE i tell you! my gosh. so we like had eye contact abit and i was like omgomg he's lookin.lol. wel then we went to my cuzzie's house for dinner then went down to the shops. i bought this oantene leave in conditioner. $5.50. not bad la. well then today. woke up late. so took a cab to school. had geog test. i'm not sure if i'll pass though, then after school stayed back with maylin to do art. then came home. yupyup. thats it fer now. VAMUSH!

ok so i last blogged on wed. well ok thursday. everything was easy and nice. so far my week has been so. track and field was cancelled cox of the rain so me and mel walked out as usual. went home and i forgot what happened. Friday, had maths test.. really crossing my fingers and prayin really hard i would pass it.. after school went to the canteen to have ,unch with maylin and irene and wenyi but ended up sitting with melanie. duh. she misses me so. haha. then we walked out to the busstop. then went home..had a little chat with my sis and mom. then had tution. then watched tv then fell asleep. then the next day, which is saturday.duh. woke up damn late cox there was no track. then went to greatworldcity to watch charlie choc factory again with my mom and sis. concluded that jhonny depp is my moms perfect partner. (as kuku as her).went to zara for awhile. got my self a short green collered blouse for only $16!! then went to isetan scotts to shop. first went to orange forever.looked around, tried on some skirts but in the end din get anything. then went to mango. mummy tried on this nice blouse and bought it. then went to topshop. mummy tried on some clothes and i tried on more skirts. managed to find a nice orange one.. so bout it at $23. not bad la.. but i really need more clothes. then mummy went to u2000 to look at pants and ended up buying like 2 pants and 3 shirts. then headed back home.. it was already about 9.45pm then. went home had a cool shower then sat down in front of the tele and watched drive me crazy. cool show.slept at around 1am. sunday. this morining woke up at around 10.20am. lazed around, had breakfast, took my bath, dressed, then went to the airport to pick aunty susan up. then went to wheelock place to have lunch. we went to fish and co. had a brilliant lunch but then ended up with a tummy ache. mummy said it was possible i'm allergic to seafood cox every time i eat it i get aches. yup. then got home slacked. then decided to blog so here i am. uhuh. till next time toodles!!!!!!!

i'm here again.. yup. no escape. wadeva. ok so on sunday, i had my facial. mummy came in to watch the procedure. aunty sally like raised the electric volts to kill my face germs so high i was about to cry! my gosh! has she no sympathy?? is she a sadist? haha. then with my face all swollen and blopped up, we went to juntion 8 for grocery shoppin adn dinner. then we went home and got ready for school the next day. monday.?? omg! i can't remember a thing! ok so lets move on to tuesday. the day i'll remember forever. we did our absailing from the 7th storey! ok i was so freakin out even before we got up! mr singh was like so laughing at me la. *embarressed* haha so ya.. melvina was the first girl that went down! she looked so calm and collected so i just concluded that she was like MUCH breaver than us. so then next came my wonka shauna. i was like so nervous for her la! but she said it was ok. still.idid not believe it. then jia hui and ruixuan went down . but then jia hui backed out.then mrs wong asked me and mel to go. but i refused to go until she did . so she went and survived. then came us. i tell you! i was not so scared when mr singh was setting up the ropes. but when it was time for us to squat and start the absailing. omg! i took so damn bloody long la! like i had to ask mr singh to make sure he wouls not let go of the safety rope and that he would hold me tight so i would not fall. and whether he was sure i would not die and stuff liddat. so the poor fellow had to patiantly answer all my questions. so unwillingly i squated. then i screamed: mr singh quick! quick! i'm gonna fall quick! ok you so won't understand unless you were in my place. i just could not hold the rope tight enough for me to stay put! so i screamed all the way down. then the people upstairs could only look and luagh! like no comforting words wadever! then while melanie and i were scolding each other and screaming, i suddenly losened my grip so much i practically flew down!and there! i did it!me and mel were like screaming like hell in the lift man! i was so happy i went again! ha! yea! i actually did it again! and as usual i was screaming all the way down. then i went home and studied for my chinese test the next day. today. was quite a nice day la.. easy and nice.. when reachin home mummy called to say going for dinner. so we went to fiesta. the sushi place to eat. then went home.. then did homework exercised and here i am.. so till next ime..bb!

ok! so here i am again . wahahahaha.
thurday. school was kinda ok. i guess. but i was really really tired! i mean like . i'm like this zombie walking around u know. o well i just noticed something about myself. i get super hyperactive when i'm tired. literally. like i can't stop talking and laughing and all. haha. so poor mummy has to stay up with me and listen to my stories. ok so back to the bloggie thinggy. met mel and shauna outside class and went down to e canteen. ate lunch then like went to the track and field area cox ben was like sooo freakin irritating me. ok so then we had this photo takin session at the back . psst. and i even managed to take a candid shot of the guys. haha! well then we waited for mrs wong and the rollerblading guys to come. i tell you i was so lookin forward to seeing darren again but in the end. hmm there was some miscommunications between the school and them so they thought it was cancelled. damn! well so then we played floorball and basket ball. while playing floorball i accidently hit shauna on the leg with my stick. OUCH! poorgurl! i think there is a blue black now. so here i shout out SHAUNA! I'M SORRY BOUT YOUR LEG THINGGY BUT I PROMISE THE BLUE BLACK WILL EVENTUALLY GO AWAY. YOU STILL LOVE ME RIGHT? DUH. SO WONKA. SORRY YA! ya i really mean that. ok so then i went home with mel and val and her brother. friday. i was really really really tired ok! i was like so about to sleep in class! ok so then after school walked to the third busstop with mel. that gundu ha! changed her mind so many times! wadeverla. so then got home then found out aunty shermin wanted to bring us out for lunch before my tution. so i got bathed then went to dome in bishan for lunch. got home, had tution then postponed my facial to sunday cox we wanted to go out for family dinner. then tua yi came to pick us up. uncle richard din come with us cox his bosses from america came. so ya... i really miss him. we got to the eating place ate talked k=joked and did everything we always did. then went back home. mummy wanted to watch [a walk to remember] so ya we did. din really cry cox i was soooo tired. my eyes were like closing know! well dearest mummy keeps forgettin the tittle of the movie . she says stuff like a long walk. long remembered walk. haha! cute la she. saturday. this morning i really din wanna wake up for track . honestly i just felt like sleepin on! well eventually i dragged myself outta bed. so went for track and like played a couple of games. one was caption ball with the med. ball. we were allowed to fight for the ball so me and jia hui were like having a cat fight. omg! we snatched like our lives depended on it! haha! it was like so fun! well then after track me and mel went to juntion 8 for bra shoppin. but we could'nt really find anything la.. in the end. mel just bought 3 pairs of earrings. and me. nothing. then i went home and like slacked alot. then irene and wenyi came for project. it was more fun then i expected la. haha! then jas msged me . she'll be calling me later i expect. goody! miss her like hell! ok so stoppin here for now. toodles!

i forgot what happened on sunday la.. i think just went for cycling in the evening.
monday. went to school for the national day celebrations. we sang songs and then watched the teachers play floorball against the students. fun la.. then it started raining so all of us like ran towards the shelter. then we got dismissed from there. so then i like fought my way across the school to meet mel shauna edwin bryan jiahao and reginald then made our way to juntion 8 for the movie. ate lunch in the food court then went to the movie place . finally mrs wong came and collected the movie tivkets. then we bought out popcorns and waited for the show to start. cute la! the show i mean. then after the show, we went to ntuc to buy chips and a tub of ice cream then mel and shauna came home . we took a bath then went down for a walk. then sat down the poolside and just talked. that was fun. then we got home and started watching a walk to remember and omigod! me and mel were like crying so hard! but shauna just sat there and talked with her darling. wadever la. gundu bum. but it was such a touching movie! then we watched the lizzie mcguire movie to look at the hot dancer i'v been talking about. then we slept. halfway through the nite i just got up and walked to my room. for wad reason? i dunno. it was kinda scary la. then in the morning i realized it was cox mel and shauna snatched my blanket away and so i got up to get my blanket. then in the morning we went down again to talk . and we had this like looong discussion about life. i never really thought about my future cox i think lifeis quite mysterious. but it was a good talk la. then mel went home. so then we went upstairs and me and shauna had another long talk bout how boys were such jerks. not all though. then shauna went home. then we prepared dinner sat down and ate while we watched the national day parade. it was good la. then i had a long talk with my mom telling her bout what i'v been doin and stuff lidat then slept eventually. so ya . see ya

i totally apologize for my violent words yesterday, but honestly just thinking of them makes me wanna puke and scream. ok. wel let that be gone.

after blogging yesterday, i called jaslyn and we chatted and chatted and i forgot bout the time. i had to leave at 12 but i had not even got ready yet! my god! it was a rush affair man. well i managed to get to pei hwa early. shauna came late. so then we all went into school and realized gavin was like so not there yet. so we waited and waited and talked and waited. mr singh was ready to give up on him. then luckily mrs wong asked him if we could take the kayakes out of school first. so by the time dragged them out, gavin arrived. had alot of fun singing and kayaking.. ohoh! mr singh had to change partners not even half way through the journey cox shauna and rui xuan could not move. haha! it was so funny! o well. then we got to the island and we swam abit. mr singh found a fish . i swear i think mr singh killed the fish once before it jumped into melvina's shirt. haha . so wierd. well then we explored the island abit. the boys found a wheel barrow so jia hao sat inside pretending to be a minister while the others pushed him. haha. then we ate drank and left . mel and me got caught in some plants. poor mel. i just could not stop laughing! so she had to do the work. yala. then went back. we got locked out of the school! so after washing the kayakes and all. we went to bathe. then flagged down a cab and sent mel to the jalan kayu bus stop then went home. again one fo mummy's gunky friends came and spoilt my day. well not really. she bought me ice cream. so she's like the best of the lot. ya

i'm really tired. came home at like 9.30pm last night. din really enjoy yesterday. when i got home. mummy was there complaining of her back. i'm so sick of hearing her moan! you might think i'm bad. but i really really can't take it any longer! everyday her friends come. then they lock themselves up in her room nad talk about god knows what! then when i come home, its so sickeing to see them ! i'm so tired of her friends now! i hate them! i dont ever wanna see them again! they think she's so sick . but wad about us??? i have feelings too. i want my mom to be alright. i wanna be the one who trakes care of her. not them! they suck! they stink! they don't tell me anything. now mummy's on the way to the doctor. again. and aunty mee peng just has to tell me to be careful with my mom. wth! of course la! what shit is she talking about when she said your mom might have to go to the hospital. would you just shut your fucking fouled isect full mouth up man! i feel like screaming it all out! i'm not invisible!

ok. so today was like any other day except of course i'm back to school again. (i was sick for the past 3 days.)
met mel before going down to the canteen to eat. talked joked and even "slept" at the track n field area. then we decided wad games to play and stuff liddat. first we played floorball. i tell u . i'm phyisicly incapable of being a goal keeper man.. if ever i'm on your team appoint me as a shooter please! i'm good at that not goal keeping! well then we took the bascket ball and started shooting it aimlessly into the net . surprisingly i scored quite a few goals. i'm so proud. well then we went back down to the parade square to play the real basket ball game.
i tell yo i hate the freakin game ok! just looking at the players running from one end of the court to the other makes me tired enough. damn. its scary know! it's a risky game cox it could lead to friendship problems if your friend loses the game for you. thats bad. lol.. rite stoppin here fer now.