i'm bored to the max!!!
ok nvm. anyway.. friday went out with the girls (=
was fun. but din really buy anything cept for a bangle. nicenice hah!
oh and people! eat subway i havent had it in a loong time and now i confirm it has nice toasted sandwiches made right in front of your eyes. haha!! ok and for people who like big scoop of ice cream for their dessert, go to the one beside world of sports in cine.. their scoop is enormous so mel had to finish it for me cox she had none.
k then spent the night watching my korean drama.. its so sad but nice.
saturday.. woke up bathes then went to mummy's office to wait for her to finish interviewing her new staffs.. then we went off for lunch at the bottle tree village food was nothing great but its an ok place la..
then went for ballet. ms mccully put me at the centre bar again-.- and i was scared out of my wits. she kept saying "sarah! pull up!! comeon! dont sag in your body!!! i wanna see the stretch!" little did she know that my newly cut throat was so needing some water and i was trying to not get sucha tiring workout cox i was afriad my throat would be too dry. HAHA but ballet was fun la. dunno wad i wud do without having the formal training on the pirouettes and all.
then in the evening was HALLOWEEN PARTY!!! haha!! so i made up then helped rae make up then went for trick or treating!!!
oh the funniest thing is darryl gu-gu completlt tricked me!! there was this house who was giving really cute chocolate eyeballs in a cauldron so even though i wasnt in any haloween costumes, i asked the girl if i could have one and she said yes.. so then i stood by the side of the road then tried unwrapping the eyeball LOL but it couldnt come off! so i was thinking, ok maybe its those coated icing chocolate balls. then i told darryl : "eh!! cannot open !! why?why?" then he said "no, this chocolate is meant to be eaten like that" so with the thought that it really was coated with icing , i bit into it and to my horror!! it had a wrapper!! pshh!! how dumb! LOL so then in the end he had to make do with my saliva and help me peel open the wrapper. hah. the choc was nice.
then to day just slacked at home then went for an evening stroll with mum and sis.
oh and my someone took my moms cashcard frm my moms car.

so things haven been good. not at all. in fact its been disaster all the while.
BUT who cares?????????? im super duper hyper and high!!! LOL i keep laughing.
its probably my way of forgetting everything. so like ya, i think acting happy really helps take the pain away cox then you dont think f you unhappiness.


ANYWAY.
yesterday left house for hougang mall to meet darlings (= we'r all gonna be promoted!! YAY. had fish porridge thanks to myunhealed throat. ANDANDSND the fish porridge sucked!! the rice was all clumped up together and they call it porridge. its more like rice soaked in soup. + the fish was like sotong. so chewy!! RAH!! haha . so anyway, wlaked round abit then saw michelle chia and mark lee in their new hair salon twister. so then maylin had to leave for training, then me and wenyi decided to go compass while meijun on the other hand, went home.
so we all bus-ed to school then me and wenyi continued bus-ing to compass..
was bloody hungry cox the dumb porridge was horrible. so we walkwalkwalk then went into the library to borrow my book (= !! then went ot buy waffle. i had to have mine a little soggy so it woudnt hurt my throat. then left to go meet mummy and han at amk central.. for dinner.
ha ramen and as usual i coullndt finish cox it was hurting my throat. so i left half the bowl there looking at me pitifuly )= haha then we went into courts to buy mummy's vacuum cleaner for her office. the sales man was kinda good so mummy bought the vacuum cleaner in like 15 mins.
skipskipskipskip.
now i'm here typing lol oh and looking forward to my outing with mel and shauna later (= miss them like sssoooo much

yea. i said i din care anymore. and its true..
i know i'll still have the memories to keep. but its hurting me that the memories were so beautiful and now this is wads left. i'v gotta try to live my days like this was never a part of my life. how? for the past months it has been. it has grown in me. i looked forward to it like something so sacred. something precious and now its crumbled down to tiny bits.
like i tell myself there can be explantions.. but this seems too long and too much.
i dont wanna get hurt any further.
maybe this is a good time to forget it all. a long break is arriving and maybe this separation can be a good thing so the loss would not be as bad as it would be when the break arrives.
its not hurting as much as i expected it to.. so is this a good thing?
maybe i shouldnt think too much anymore. let this just be a phase i'll grow out of.

ok firstly i would like to thank all those wonderful people who visited me at the hospital (=
ya my op din involve any risk yet u all came so like that was so touching..
thanks for visiting!
maylin wenyi meijun irene pooty leon aaron wenan fariz sherman akmal-momo yiyi uncle danny rae jann tuayi uncla alan aunty may daryll gugu melanie and shauna.
thanks for the pressies!
hannah!!my sis- strawberry short cake huge balloon!!
aunty dolly- birds nest (though i dont like it =/)
momo sherman fariz-moomoo cow + the nice card
darlings-for the beautiful flowers
tuayi-for dinner
yiyi-for the ice cream
mummy-for the flowers (=
auntymay- for the famous amos cookies muffins and busicuit lollipops
jeremyteo- the six songs over msn lol. ya thanks!
the encouraging msges!
huixin
benedict
bernie
momo
wenyi
maylin
pooty
jeremyteo
melanie



ok so now i'm feeling like shit as i haven been able to have a decent meal for a looong time.
got admitted at bout 2+ on wednesday..
could eat whatever i wanted so stuffed loads of food down..
my lucky number 8516
ward 85 bed 16..
had the whole room to myself for one night..
was cautioned my last meal before my op dat (191006) was to be at 12.00 midnite.
so ate till that moment harhar..
was kinda scary the room.
woke up in the night thinking i saw a nun then couldnt go back to sleep.
anyway, the next day was spent with me fearing as the time ticked by slowly and soon i was called to the operatiion theatre (O.T)
got changed then proceeded to the waiting room.
soon this friendly nurse came and brought my to my designated threatre. i got up the operating table then they stared injecting me with the anestasia. din even know when i blacked out. woke up in the recovery room.. urse covered me up in warm blankets.. felt throat throbbing a little.. was a bit groggy.
then got wheeled back to my ward.
i was so surprised to hear mummy say that my friends were in my ward.
was very touched..
then spent the time talking to them..
the pain wasnt that bad then.. culd talk and eat pretty well.
in the night, when mel and shauna visited, it was a bit more painful and by the time yiyi and all came i couldnt even talk.
slept welll. woke up in the morning with throat hurting even more
couldnt eat. even the appetising maggie mee didnt go down my throat.

ritey enuf bout the op.
oh i forgot to mention my wonderful outing with my darlings to sentosa a day b4 the op!!!!
our glorious dinner at esplanade! i'll update more on that when i have the mood lol.
in the mean time speedy recovery for me yea!!
toodles

i'm sick i'm sick i'm sick i'm sick i'm sick i'm sick i'm sick i'm sick.

awwww this feels terrible!!

went to imm with mummy yesterday to buy some of her office stuf.. half way through i felt my whole body aching like crazy! then felt damn it cold. so like mummy took some shawl frm the store to cover me lol..
on the way to go for rae's hightea lunch slept in the car.. the high tea was great..
there was this waiter though, hilarious shit!! when i walked in, he looked at me so i smiled back, i think he tot that was some kind of trigger or wad.. once my cup of water went lower than 3/4 of the cup he'll come to refill it for me. somemore he'd bend over until his chest is like forced in my face kinds thing. i couldnt help laughing!! then there was this time i went to get more food from the buffet table, he almost talked to me. lukily i just quickly took the food then walked off to the table. like whats his problem lol!! scary! if he was cute or somthing then i would be like yay!! but this one was barly handsome or what. not completly unsightly but not cute. ya i dunno wad im babbling about.
ao anyway, woke up today in cold sweat thanks to my flu.. argghh i wanna get well )=

EXAMS ARE OVVVEEEEEERR!!!!

ok so i had my last paper in the morning yesterday.. chinese listening..
then after that went to breakfast in canteen with xue'e.. back to class to slack slack slack. i slept!!!! haha! but class was really boring.. anyhow, after school went out with darlings !!!! pooty maylin wenyi mohohohoo.
in the night went out with mel had sooo much fun! upload the pictures some other time la.
as we were walking back to raffles city frm esplanade, my throat felt like shit. my body was aching and i was flu-ing.
these are symptoms of my tonsilities.. please sarah get well b4 your op. if i dont, they'll have to postpone the date and leave me in suspence for eternity.. now i just hope i dont collaspe during ballet later...


HAPPY BIRTHDAY RAE!!! (COUZ)

due to my sudden guilt and kindness post deleted

i'm so so sad )= x100000000000000000000000

i completely screwed up all my papers today.
ss was like ewww
and math, 12 makrs have already been duducted even before the exa, papers have been marked cox i left it blank )=

oh man.. i broke down after math paper.. this life sucks like hell. i cant wait for things to get better. i really cant

good afternoon everyone!!

so i'm in the midst of exams.
mothertongue yes!
enlish 1 n 2
geog
physics
math paper2
poa ppr 2

k so i'm left with
socialstudies tmr..
math 1 tmr..
chemistry oh no. scared!!
poa ppr 1 oh wadever. i know i'll fail
mothertongue listening do u even count this a paper? LOL

ok so lets see.. todays paper was completly screwed. firstly i blanked out for geog!! like everything just vanished from my mind!! POO!!
and the worst thing?? those easy 1mark give away questions which involves writing the name of the location given on the map was completly screwed up by me.
i wrote lim chukang as kimchukang. like WTF right!!
this place doesnt even exist!!! and so many people laughed at my mistake )= so ya. this sicks.
then poa. i just crapped the whole paper away. then slept for 1/2hr.. b4 waking up to hand in the paper..
then went to compass for lunch with maylin
163-ed home.
i'm now like studying ss. how is that possible when i'm here blogging. lol. ok so this is my break la ok.. i'll be mugging till late tonight!!
tution tml in preparation for chemistry!!

OHOH i'v planned my post exam activities already!! muahaha
FRIDAY- outing in the day with darlings.. at night towning with wonks!!
SATURDAY-spread my high-ness during ballet muahaha
SUNDAY-outing with darlings!! maybe..
TUESDAY-sentosa with darlings!! maybe..
WEDNESDAY THURSDAY FRIDAY- kk hospital for my op AHHHH I'M SCARED!! but i shall be brave. i believe i'll come out alive and that i wont wake up during the op. yup' I WILL SURVIVE!!

haha!! ok lets put all the sadness aside today and be high!!!! (=

i know i'v gotta let go. but i just cant. somebody please take me away

ok yesterday was so not my day ):

woke up early then found out teacher andrea cancelled tution cox she feel sick. poorthing.. get well soon!
then me and maylin decided to go tp library to study instead..
so i climbed out of bed.. wanted to go get clothes but darryl was still sleeping -.- wtf. so i had to wear mumy's clothes..
the good thing bout it is that luckily she updates her clothes regularly.. so yea. wore my fbt's and her puma top. ^^
then left house while darryl was in the shower. haha!! i simply left a note on the whiteboard. great hur. the worst thing is that as i opened the shoe cupboard to get my shoes, the fucking edge of the door smashed into my head. oh god. the pain!! i felt like screaming.
then on my way to the bus-stop i realized i din bring my phy txtbk or handbook. like wtf how was i to study??
luckily darling maylin surprised me with her brothers physics textbook. HAHA
so met her at her busstop then she brought me to eat the oh-so-yummy lor mee. (= it was nice la! but couldnt finish it.. was feeling kinda sick..
then we went to popular to buy foolscaps. ANDANDAND the stupidest thing was that as we were reachig the library i realized her brothers physics book wa left in popular. so we walked all the way back to popular. lol.
finally we got to the library.. studied quite abit..
then decided to take a bus ride.. so bus-ed to yiochukang road and back to toapayoh again..
went to may's house to change inot ballet gear. then off to ballet!!
i was having very very bad stomache cramps cox of the haze..
ballet was great. enjoyed it thouroughly.
was able to catch up la. not that bad.. but my tummy was lurching as we did the jumps.
then me and iris went to ntuc to buy my drink. teeheee..
ohohoh and i found out she lives bloody near me!! like i'm at pemimpin drive and she's at jalan pemimpin. HOW COOL.

somebody please save me. i think i'm on the verge of dying.

mummy has gone to malaysia with hannah to attend a relatives funeral..
their gonna be away for 2 days. i cried buckets when they left this morning.

the haze in singapore is really making me feel that the world is just such a polluted place.

anyway.. i'm done with chinese , eng1 and math2 paper..
went for tution yesterday.. had a great time chartting with teacher andrea.. i even took a picture with one of the childcare children.. i'll upload it later.. simply adorable.
sometimes i just wish i was forever cooped up in the centre.. thats place takes al my unhappiness away..
and facing the computer just brings it all back again. then why am i still fucking using the computer??? cox i cant do without it.. as much as it gives me unhappiness, hope comes along with it.
came home from tution, decided to go for a movie.
so the four of us. (me mummy hannah and darryl) went to j8 to catch the worldtrade centre..
i cried like crazy. it was sucha good movie. captured how they felt trapped beneath the rubbles. yet they used their wll power and memory of their loved ones to stay alive. this movie made me realize how important our lives are.
and how love can affect a person.
after the movie ended, i was in sucha rotten mood. no idea why. i guess ita all thanks to mummy who left this morning.

me and yangzhi. he's soo cute

















me and sister at cafe cartel.





















i hate this feeling. the tightness in my heart.
why arent you talking you fucing bastard. what have i done?

i'm scared. very scared ):
1)exams are here in less than 5 days. i'm not done revising.
2)what going on beyond these conversations? what extent have the damage been done? this is killing me.

ok just some pictures from the study sleepover with melo!! (:



RANDOM



















distorted. HAHA


















our fetish with reflections (:


















sketch !! x)




















mels gonna kill me!!! but i love this picture.























MUG HARD!!

ok its like almost 1am and i'm still here (:
supposed to be studying but i miss blogging so i'm taking a break!!

anyway friday after school mummy picked me up frm school then went to holland village for lunc =D

we had nydc for lunch yumyum
then dropped hannah off for tution and headed to kk for my checkup.
gonna have my op ( to remove my tonsils) on the 19 of oct. though i have to be admitted one day earlier.
and i scared. i dont want injections, i dont want my throat to hurt, i dont wanna be aloe at night! dontwantdontwantdontwant!!
ok lets not talk about it.
well then came home, then waited for melanie to come for the study sleepover she achieved alot while all i did was laugh and msn. -.-

o well. thanks for the night babe(: enjoyed greatly!!!

today.
melo went off in the morning.. then learnt from mummy then deryl gu-gu was in singapore for his university and would be staying at our place for

2 weeks b4 his room he rented is ready. (:

ok gotta get used to someone living in my place. haha..
well he seems nice so far.........(hee)
ok then went to pick him. alan gugu and aunty may from his campus..
then went for lunch at botanical gardens..
headed home for him to unpack then left for dinner..
went to long house.
after that sent uncle alan and aunty may to asia hotel for them to catch their coach back to kl.

then came back home and slacked..
now everyone's asleep at home and i'm here typing this post. teehee..
in order not to disturb deryl gu-gu's sleep i decided

to close the door.
though its fucking hot, i;m gonna tolerate it for him to have a good nites sleep. aint i great x)

ok some pictures frm last night

sarah writes/ 10/01/2006 12:54:00 AM