Wednesday, April 04, 2007
second post of the day..
iv got a feeling my life is at its low now.
nothing seems to excite me anymore.
my hearts always so tight and i find it so hard to breathe! am i like having asthma or something?
anyway, cousins are over at my place now.. and today, all of them [without the mc's waha] didnt wake up for school.. so the four of us are athome together.
anyway, theres just so much to worry for now.. iv seen generations of men letting woman down. its happening again.i keep telling myself its just the minority and men arent all like this.but how can i believe this theory when the men close to me constantly break their families hearts?i went through it before and i know how painful it is. being a daughter or someone so irresponsible and selfish. someone who thinks his words suffice.and now my hearts breaking all over again. this time not for myself. everytime i recieve new news, i cringe cos i cannot believe the kinda things he has done. maybe im in no position to judge, but in general, this is my view. thinking of the both of you, i comepltely understand what your going through. maybe thats why iv been trying so hard to open ur locks. though i know maybe its hard for me to do so to the smaller one.but you, everytime i try to close up to you, you shun away. iv been pressurized to talk to you, or to understand and explain to you wad it is like. it is the right thing, and i find, with me telling you my experiance, it would at least comfort you a little. why do u keep running away from me?i dont want any of these to strain the relationship we have now. it breaks my heart to see you like this u know? i want u to know i care.theres someone to talk to and thats me. im here! i wanna help to make this more bearable. iv been praying non-stop for you my dear, and i hope it helps, i know my tolerance level may not be high and that sometimes, you feel my coldness. but this change has been so sudden to me and i feel that im already trying my best to adjust.now, everytime i recieve new news, i become so fed-up, and sometimes i just wanna shut it out. but being part of this unity, i know i cnt back out and stand aside. i wanna do my part, as a senior, as someone who can help. theres so much for me to share, please help me lift this burden.
sarah writes/ 4/04/2007 03:57:00 PM
